Why is your life experience going the way it is?

How you see your outer world has to do with what’s going on with your inner world. In other words, your experience of the world around you is a direct reflection of what’s going on with the world within you. Whatever your mind thinks, your body follows. That’s how powerful you truly are!

Just as the rain falls on all of us alike, the Universe DOES NOT take sides, it does not judge you or punish you (as some would like to think). YOU are THE ultimate decision-maker on how you want to shape your inner world to reflect a more appealing outer experience. You ARE the product of your own thoughts.

So take a moment to ponder: what kind of thoughts do you predominantly fill your mind with (whether directly or indirectly)? Are they thoughts stemmed from blame, anxiousness, self-righteousness, anger, despair, impatience, self-pity? Or are they thoughts of ways to be less judgmental, more forgiving, patient, compassionate, accepting, modest, and open to learning more on how to restore the balance in your inner world?

Should you stress out over this?

Question for Penny:

How do you handle moments when you encounter unpleasant or unkind people? I can’t help but get so angry or annoyed and I know it’s not healthy for me to feel this way so much. How do I protect myself from taking it so personally??

Answer:

It takes a lot more courage and wisdom to be kind to someone than it does to be unkind. If you treat someone in a pleasant way, and they do not extend to you the same courtesy, just remind yourself “it’s unfortunate they’re not feeling their best” and then, kindly walk away or put your attention somewhere else. Don’t let others sway you so easily and have you spin the situation into streams of negative thoughts.

Look at it this way: When you’re extending yourself in a positive way, it’s like a “gift” you’re offering to others. What you receive in return from them is “their gift” back to you. If in this moment, a person is not in a kind mood, then their gift to you will somehow reflect this mood. And this is their gift to share — it has noting to do with you. You do not need to make this gift yours.

We all have our moments where we don’t feel our best, so have compassion and understanding that one can only truly give what they have. So if in this moment, a person does not have it in them to extend kindness, then so be it. Understand that it is their choice, and their challenging life lesson.

Remember: You possess a powerful personal tool called “choice”. You can choose to accept “their gift” and allow your mood to be easily swayed by them. OR you can choose NOT to accept their gift and leave it behind. If you leave it behind, this means the gift will remain in their hands — not yours. You do not need to unwrap it into your life. Just leave “that gift” behind and put your attention elsewhere. There’s an abundant amount of gracious gifts in this world ready for you to accept, unwrap, and uncover. You don’t need to hold on to gifts you do not appreciate.

A special new year message for YOU

Time and again I hear your heart go into knots trying to make a friendship work — whether it be with a friend, or a family member. Forcing a relationship does not make it genuine.

Someone dear once told me that a friendship (relationship) is either for “a reason, a season or a lifetime.” And so I’ve come to learn that during the course of any relationship, situations will unfold to help us realize their purpose.

Don’t force a relationship to continue into the new year if you truly feel that in this moment in time you could bring nothing more to that relationship, or that it could bring nothing more to add to your growth. Who you bring into your “new” year could set the tone for your year.

You see, your spirit deserves your attention and nurturement. Whether it’s a relationship you were born into, or one you made along the way, the integrity of your spirit is somewhat compromised if you hold onto relationships that do not (or no longer) add to your spiritual growth.

Don’t try to force your way into a “lifetime” friendship/relationship with someone who is meant to be a “reason” or a “season.” One of your “life work” is to learn to distinguish the difference.

If something isn’t meant to be, forcing the situation will only lead to spiritual imbalance, which always leads to some form of pain (suffering). Recognize the truth for you and stay true to you.

Be honest with yourself: Who in your life could be a reason, a season or a lifetime? Be fair to them, and yourself, by listening to your heart. And if you still don’t yet know the answer to that question, it’s more than okay! Don’t beat yourself up and hastily come to a decision.

Trust that there is a much grander force constantly at work to restore balance for us if we’re willing to TRUST. Some refer to this powerful force as “Universe” or “God” (or whatever name that makes sense to believe). You see, once you state your intention to have clarity, the greater forces are already at work and your only job is to go with the flow until you know… and you WILL know!

And so it is vital to your spirit that you learn to trust… trust this bigger energy which its existence you may (or may not) have been questioning. When you design your “life on purpose,” you choose who you want to devote more energy to and who you’d rather devote less to.

It may sound “selfish,” but selfish is NOT a bad thing because you can only give what you have. So when you take care of yourself in this fair way, only then will you have more of yourself to give; and only then can you create a kind of balance in your own Being that allows you to genuinely give back to those who really matter.

Tonight, set your intentions as you ring in the new year! Count down to a new year filled with more people who can make your life feel abundant! xo